galaxystiel:

Coda - 13x01 Lost and Found

“Anything?”

The word echoed in Dean’s head and made his chest ache even more that it already was. He didn’t even think that was possible, for the loss of Castiel to bring him more pain.

And yet.

He’d allowed himself to hope. For one split-second, he thought maybe this could all be undone and there would be a way to bring Cas back to life.

Back to him.

It was stupid, of course it was. And yet, Cas had brought Bobby back from the dead once before. Raised both him and Sam from the pit. If this kid was so powerful that the angels wanted him, then maybe it was possible.

The hope cut deeper than the loss, knowing that his prayers to Chuck had gone unanswered. That God had truly done his last favour for them. Brought Cas back for the last time.

He was gone.

It didn’t truly sink in until he drew the covers back and looked at Castiel’s face one last time. This wasn’t Cas. It was an empty shell. The best friend, the man, the angel, the everything he once knew was no longer contained in an empty vessel.

Dean didn’t let anyone else touch the body. He bound Castiel himself, built the funeral pyre from scratch while Sam and Jack watched, the tension in his body just daring them to offer to help. He built the whole thing alone, carried Cas to the top of the pyre and tried to ignore the coldness seeping through the sheets.

The fire blazed brilliant. Beautiful. Destructive.

Just like Castiel.

Dean couldn’t think of a more fitting goodbye.